Saturday, June 14, 2008

The Happening commercial we wanted to see... (adult language)

Sample radio spot for The Happening:

You liked Signs? You liked Sixth Sense? Well, FUCK YOU, and fuck your off-screen alien invasion and implied violence! Those loser Shyamalan movies were PG-13! But not The Happening! That's right, you pansies... The Happening is rated R!! That means onscreen violence, buckets of blood and gore, tons of frightening images, and maybe, if you're nice, we'll throw in shots of Zooey Deschanel's va-jj!!! What about Lady In The Water? Up yours! That was a fucking fairy-tale for children! You loser, you don't deserve The Happening! Why? Because, The Happening is rated R!!! That means it's RESTRICTED! That means, if you're under 17 you need a parent or guardian, bitches! And you know what? If you're sixteen and still go to the movies with your parents, you're a punk-ass loser! Maybe you should just wait 2.5 years to see the FX network premiere of The Happening, with its cropped image, it's constant commercials, and it's edited for content form, to protect your sissy TV-14 sensibilities! The Happening isn't rated no whussy TV-14, it's rated R!!!

M Night Shyamalan's The Happening. Opens June 13th. Rated... R!!!! (Fuckers!)

Anyway, check back tomorrow for the Friday estimates.

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