Brandon Peters dissects the 007 series part 07: Diamonds Are Forever

With Skyfall dropping in theaters in just a few months, along with the 50th anniversary of the James Bond series, a close friend and fellow film nerd, Brandon Peters, has generously offered to do a comprehensive review of the entire 007 film franchise. Today is the seventh entry, with at look at not only the worst Sean Connery 007 adventure, but one of the worst films in the whole series, Diamonds Are Forever. I hope you enjoy what is a pretty massive feature leading up the November 9th release of Skyfall. I'll do my best to leave my two-cents out of it, give or take a few items I have up my sleeve (including a guest review from my wife as she sings the praises of her favorite 007 film, you won't believe what it is). But just because I'm stepping aside doesn't mean you should, as I can only hope for robust discussions in the comments section. Without further ado...

Diamonds Are Forever

1971

Director: Guy Hamilton

Starring: Sean Connery, Jill St. John, Charles Gray, Bruce Glover, Putter Smith, Norman Burton

Rated PG

Go blow up your pants!

                        ~Tiffany Case

STATS

Kills: 8

Bond Girls: Tiffany Case, Plenty O’Toole

Car: 1971 Ford Mustang Mach 1 "Fastback"

Locales: Amesterdam, Las Vegas

Odd Villain Trait:  Mr. Kidd and Mr. Wint are the original Ambiguously Gay Duo.  Peter Franks fits the Red Grant mold.

Song:  “Diamonds Are Forever” performed by Shirley Bassey. 

Everyone breathe a sigh of relief.  Sean Connery is back.  The director of Goldfinger has returned.  Shirley Bassey is singing the theme song again.  We’re going to recapture that old magic that was “apparently” lost with the previous film.  Following On Her Majesty’s Secret Service,  the 007 brass felt that there was a drop off (especially in America, hence why this is set in Las Vegas) with the Bond series and were willing to do anything they could to get it back on track.  Diamonds Are Forever may have been the financial success the studio was looking for, but is a failure as a quality picture.  In short, it's the first James Bond film that outright stinks.