We are not in a slump, our best players are just still in the batting box. Explaining the slow start to summer 2010.

Listen people, we are not in a summer box office slump. No matter what The New York Times is trying to sell you, audiences have not deserted the multiplexes in favor of other entertainment options (yep, Brooks Barnes is at it again). Why has this summer been so middling thus far? Simple, with the exception of Iron Man 2 (which opened with $128 million and just crossed $300 million today or tomorrow), the really big guns haven't been released yet. Besides, as occasionally is the case, studios were spoiled by the mega-movies that did uncommonly well over the winter and Spring. Aside from Avatar, which made about $400 million of its $749 million over 2010, we had the $332 million-grossing Alice in Wonderland, as well as the solid smash hits in How to Train Your Dragon and Clash of the Titans. As far as the summer season goes, just like the summers of my youth (1988-1995), the real peak season starts in mid-June, or this Friday to be exact. In other words, come this Friday, to quote the last true mid-June giant, "Now... the real game begins now."

Karate Kid stuns, A-Team opens just ok. Weekend box office review (06/13/10).

Ironically, in a weekend that banked on 1980s nostalgia, this weekend brought back the summers of my youth in a different way. Back when I was growing up, June was THE month of summer. Sure studios would release a big title over Memorial Day and/or the Fourth of July weekend, but the (alleged) big 800 pound gorillas debuted in mid-to-late June. Who Framed Roger Rabbit?, Batman, Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves, Jurassic Park, The Lion King... the film that most expected to rule a given summer was usually released in the heart of June. Alas, since 1996 (when Twister, Mission: Impossible, and Independence Day crushed everything else released that summer), the studios have banked on early May, Memorial Day weekend, and the Fourth of July weekend (which would occasionally include the very last day of June), and the Warner Bros' mid-July slot as prime real estate. This June, at least over the next two weekends, mid-June is once again a release-period to be reckoned with.

ET does puff piece on Thor, makes tentpole movie look stupid and cheap.

Leaving aside the obnoxious questions, all of which centered on how big, tall, and ripped star Chris Hemsworth has made himself in order to play a warrior God, I have to wonder what the hell Paramount was thinking. Yes, I've said before that Paramount should use its uncommonly hot cast as a selling point, but I wasn't referring to childish tittering. Everyone interviewed (Hemsworth, Natalie Portman, director Kenneth Branagh) came off like childish idiots, and the footage shown basically made the film look like a CW Roswell spin-off. Yes, you got a few brief glimpses of Hemsworth in his official Thor costume, as well as a momentary glance of Anthony Hopkins as Odin and Idris Elba as Heimdall. But the big chunk of footage basically had Chris Hemsworth running around in blue T-shirt and jeans and half-heartedly beating up black-suited men (Shield agents?). Your first live-action look at a bazillion-dollar Marvel comic book epic, and it's plainclothes Hemsworth, Portman, Kat Dennings (wearing a snow hat, as required by law for all movies featuring Kat Dennings), and I believe Stellan Skarsgard running down a random small-town street as if they were shooting a mid-season Smallville episode. When the best thing you can say about the film so far is that Natalie Portman looks awfully pretty as Jane Foster, that means it's not quite time to show off footage. First impressions people, they sting.

Scott Mendelson

Has our world gone mad? Sarah McLachlan gets happy in new video.

It's not a terrible song, and the video isn't anything special, but the concept is troubling. The song, titled "Loving You Is Easy" is the first single for her new album Laws of Illusion, which debuts on June 15th. The song basically has McLachlan waxing not-so-poetically about how happy she is with the new man in her life. And that is the problem. If I wanted to listen to puppies-and-rainbows melodies about the joys of new love and the sweetness of romance, I'd listen to a Taylor Swift song. I'm sorry, call me old fashioned, but when I listen to Sarah McLachlan music, I expect to be soulfully depressed and artfully bummed out, with soaring odes to misery and suffering plus a dash of gorgeously-sung hopelessness. This is a woman who is the go-to artist when they need a song for a commercial begging you to save downtrodden animals. This is a woman who, bless her lovely voice and compelling lyrics, put out a genuinely depressing Christmas CD a few years back. We'll see how the rest of the album turns out, but I damn well better hear some bitter ballads, sorrowful sonnets, and decidedly un-merry melodies. You're not Weird Al Yankovich, you're Sarah Fu&*#n McLachlan!

Scott Mendelson

PS - While my Taylor Swift reference was intended in jest, I did listen to McLachlan back in the day, and I'm not ashamed to admit it (when you're already a married family man, you can admit all kinds of such vices). But, when I was still a swinging bachelor, the rule was simple: Getting a girl to play her Sarah McLachlan CDs in order to set the mood = Good Idea. Whipping out your own copy of Fumbling Towards Ecstasy or Surfacing to set the mood = Bad Idea.

Walt Disney's Tangled (formally Rapunzel) gets an obnoxiously pandering boy-friendly and tween-targeted teaser.

I wrote at length back in March about how Disney executives were attempting to make their adaptation of Rapunzel more boy-friendly by adding a macho swashbuckling hero to the mix. I had no idea how far-gone they were, but now we can see that they really do believe that the reason The Princess and the Frog slightly underperformed was because it centered around a protagonist who had a vagina. This is a pathetically cynical bit of pandering of the highest order, attempting to turn a classically female-driven fairy tale into an adventure story for boys that happens to contain a 'feisty' love interest. Don't worry, I'm sure Rapunzel will be 'strong willed, independent, and not just a damsel in distress', and she may even punch out a bad guy or two. Is that the movie? I have no idea, but that's absolutely what's being sold, to the detriment of the final product (the 'she's been grounded... like, forever' tagline doesn't help either). And while I could sit here and babble on about the gender-relations implications of such a move, I'll simply that this teaser makes the movie look like a terrible, annoyingly 'hip' cartoon, in the vein of Happily N'Ever After. On the plus side, even if it is as bad as it looks, at least it will stink in three dimensions.

Scott Mendelson

Knight and Day moves two days early. Why Tom Cruise is, for the moment, still a movie star and a box office draw.

Long story short - Knight and Day, Fox's action-comedy directed by James Mangold and starring Tom Cruise and Cameron Diaz, is set to open two days earlier than intended. Instead of directly facing off against Grown Ups (which stars Adam Sandler and every major star who has ever been in an Adam Sandler picture), the somewhat well-buzzed project will now open on Wednesday, June 23rd. Long reason short - Adam Sandler comedies generally open to about $35-40 million, and the track records of Cameron Diaz and Tom Cruise means that the action picture probably won't win the weekend. Besides, the move gives it two more days before the 1,600 pound gorilla known as Twilight Saga: Eclipse takes its best shot at The Dark Knight's $203 million five-day record (the five-day opening weekend record-holder is Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, with $200 million). As far as how well Knight and Day will open, you can bet that the tabloids are itching to tear Cruise apart when the film doesn't open to blockbuster levels. But guess what? It probably won't.

Introducing 'Rumors from the crazy guy on the corner': Joseph Gordon-Levitt as the Riddler in Chris Nolan's Batman 3 (AKA - Shadow of the Bat)?

I've wrestled for sometime with how to discuss news in a timely manner when so much of the relevant movie news begins as rumor. I don't like to discuss rumors as if they are factual, but I also like to discuss stuff when it allegedly breaks. So, this will be the start of a new feature: 'News from the crazy guy on the corner'. To put it simply, anything I discuss here should be considered 100% rumor, and any analysis I offer should be taken as a theoretical 'if it turns out to be true' capacity. So if I find myself discussing something like that relatively debunked 'Indiana Jones goes to the Bermuda Triangle' story from a couple of days ago (I liked Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, so I say go for it), or whether or not Joseph Gordon-Levitt is in talks to play the Riddler in Nolan's third Batman picture (makes sense, Nolan likes to poach actors from project to project), please know that I am not assuming that any of this will turn out to be correct.

'Wax On, F*ck Off' - a funny and brilliant social satire.

Wax On, F*ck Off with Ralph Macchio from Ralph Macchio

Not only is this thing laugh-out-loud funny, but it's a shockingly intelligent and dead-on look at the inexplicable double-standard regarding rising male stars versus rising female stars, which itself goes back to the classic 'men should seed their wild oats, but women should be virginal and pure' cliche. And wow, Mr. Macchio has aged better than anyone else of his generation. At 48, he looks even younger and healthier than the eternally-young Matthew Broderick, John Cusack, and Tom Cruise.

Scott Mendelson

The Sorcerer's Apprentice gets one last (?) trailer.

I personally preferred the prior trailer, with its emphasis on the quippy relationship between Nicolas Cage and Jay Baruchel. This one is more about setting up plot and showing off a bit more special effects and villainy (Alfred Molin, Gregory Woo, and Alice Krige). Still, the snarkiness is there and this one looks as much an acting treat as a special effects demo reel. I could do without the closing credit 'It's the coolest job ever', but the post-credits button is actually pretty amusing. And frankly, I rather dig the music that has been used in all of the trailers for this film, which seems to be a slightly-altered version of 'A Pain That I'm Used To' from Depeche Mode. It's a very different tempo from most trailer music and helps distinguish the campaign. This won't be high art, but it should be good PG-rated fun that is aimed as much at adults as kids. Opening Wednesday July 14th, it should be just the thing to unwind with two days before Inception theoretically blows all of our collective minds. As always, we'll see...

Scott Mendelson

"Always Be Closing". Glee again makes up for flawed middle with grand finale.

In a day when Lost can't wrap up their six-year run without negating everything that came before it, and even 24 can't end with a bang thanks to an upcoming movie version (the series finale was remarkably similar to the finale of season four), it's nice to see a final episode, even just a season finale, go out with a little style. Yes, the Glee mid-season finale was sharper and better paced, especially as two of the dramatic highlights (the kids doing a song for their teacher and Will making one last play for Emma) were reruns of last year's mid-season climax. Yes most of the break-out characters were put on the sidelines to focus to the original leads: Will, Sue, Finn, and Rachel. Yes, it's absolutely absurd that a character who has confessed to attempting to fix a dance competition just months ago would be allowed to judge a higher level of said competition. And the insertion of Rachel's long-lost mother proved to be a big fat deus ex machina to allow a known character to adapt Quinn and Puck's newborn.