Saturday, June 28, 2008

"I prefer to watch shitty movies so I can feel good about myself. There is nothing better than sitting in bed and enjoying a shitty comedy. I laugh at the bad jokes and I smile as I convince myself, as I often need to, that my work doesn't suck as bad as what I am watching. It gives me the confidence to make movies. I call them movies to have the flu by -- movies that are great if you need to kill time while sitting in bed with the flu." -- Judd Apatow.


I do the same thing, but for different reasons. Aside from not wanting to waste a good film when you're feeling sick and/or sad (you don't want to associate the film with a bad day or a bad event), when you're sick, your tolerance becomes lower and your standards become almost non-existent. Everything is entertaining, sad, or funny. The Fog is terrifying at 3am in the morning when you're half asleep. And as for things being funnier when you're sick...

When I was about eleven, I was out of school for about two weeks due to a flu that became phenomena. I distinctly recall lying on a couch in the study under 'the sick blanket' (a thick, comfy quilt that was reserved for when you were sick) and watching a random episode of Tiny Toons. Even at eleven, I knew that Tiny Toons was mainly mediocre, with hints of cleverness and growing pains that paved the way for Animaniacs and Pinky & The Brain. Anyway, I'm watching this random episode of Tiny Toons, and every single punchline had me laughing so hard that I couldn't breathe. It was the weirdest thing I would experience for many years.

Ages later, last year, while I was home sick from work during the period that my wife was pregnant, I caught a nasty case of 'sympathy symptoms'. In this case, emotionalism was my symptom. I knew something was up when I caught the denouement of Batman Begins and watered up a little during the final scenes at the charred remains of Wayne Manor. It only got worse. I was watching various episodes of The West Wing, seasons 1 and 2 (the episodes with commentary), and I swear I watered up at every single emotional beat, happy and sad. It was the strangest thing...

Friday, June 27, 2008

Weekend Box Office Bingo...

Not much to report here...

Wall-E - with universally fantastic reviews, and manufactured controversy about the film's content (it's about the environment, no it's about fat people, no it's about consumerism, etc), expect a solid $65 million this weekend, with terrific legs to follow. But, anything above $50 million is just fine for this downright ballsy art house cartoon that's sure to be popular and leggy.

Wanted - It's terrible, but the critics overall seem to be giving it a pass. The marketing has been solid and there is real desire for a hard-R violence-filled action film. On that note, this film more or less delivers. So expect Wanted to debut to about $35 million (anything over $30 million is a triumph), which will hopefully help ease talk about whether women can open action films if they have at least the appearance of quality. James McAvoy is the star, but this thing is being sold completely on Angelina Jolie.

More tomorrow when the actual numbers pour in.

Scott Mendelson

Hancock is terrible... because it's not a family film and thus shouldn't open on July 4th weekend?

Roger Friedman of FoxNews.com calls Hancock 'Will Smith's $150 million Disaster'. But it is not a critique, but rather a judgment based on a false premise. Namely that July 4th is for family movies and thus Hancock should be a family movie.

Um, how about we review the movie and not whether it is appropriate for children. A) it's PG-13, the same rating as Smith's decidedly not for kids I Am Legend. B) July 4th is not necessarily a family film weekend by law.

In 1991, Terminator 2 broke records ($55 million in five-days) on this weekend. In 1992, Eddie Murphy opened the R-rated Boomerang. In 1993, the big smash that weekend was The Firm, an R-rated 2.5 hour legal thriller. Blown Away, Judge Dredd, The Patriot, Scary Movie 2, Terminator 3, War Of The Worlds (PG-13 but certainly not for kids either)... The list goes on and on.

Most of Friedman's rant is over the fact that it is a film that is inappropriate for young children and that Smith dares to star in an unlikable role. I knew that from the trailer, to say nothing of the media reports detailing the film's struggle to avoid an R. This isn't news and it isn't a review. Hell, it's not even gossip, but rather an attempt to create controversy where none exists.

Scott Mendelson

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Um... Meet Dave... opens July 11th. Don't Panic!

$20 says that's funnier than anything in the movie Meet Dave. So, if you're on the road and you see that, you're not drunk, you're not dreaming, and you're not having a flashback. It's also not a hostile alien invader, so please do not shoot at it or try to run it off the road. This has been Scott Mendelson's Traffic Safety Tidbit for the day. Drive safe, or Eddie Murphy will eat you and your family.

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

X-Files: I Want To Believe - shoulda been an 'R'.

Of all the movies coming out this summer, there is one movie that probably would have benefited most from getting an R-rating instead of PG-13: X-Files: I Want To Believe.

First of all, the show has been off the air since 2002, so even if you a mere eleven when the finale aired, you're already seventeen now and thus could buy a ticket for any R-rated film. Second of all, after a six year gap between the show and the movie and a ten-year gap between movies, there needs to be something more to entice the casual fans, the ones who quit before the end and never looked back.

The show always pushed the boundaries of acceptable television violence and intensity, so why not give fans a taste of what the franchise could have been like without content restrictions. A PG-13 X-Files 2 has fans curious and somewhat nostalgic. An R-rated X-Files film would do that much more to create excitement. Keep in mind that this film probably didn't cost much more than the $60 million they spent on 'Fight The Future'. It doesn't need to be a four-quadrant smash hit to be heavily profitable (future note - the budget ended up being a mere $30 million).

Obviously, it isn't going to happen. The film has already been rated PG-13 'for violent and disturbing content and thematic material'. But it is a lost opportunity and should be noted as such.

Scott Mendelson

Hancock: The Comprised Cut?

David Poland of Movie City News is up with a surprisingly positive and refreshingly spoiler-free look at Hancock. It's the kind of review that makes me see a movie that I was previously lukewarm on. I share his affection for The Rundown and I love Friday Night Lights (didn't like The Kingdom much, but that was for reasons seemingly unrelated to Berg). But there is another big factor to consider.

According to Arclight Cinemas, it's a mere 92 minutes. It was previously listed as 115 minutes. As many know from the New York Times article back in May, the film has been batted around many times as the filmmakers struggled to get a PG-13 out of a script that was intended to be a hard-R. I think we all knew this would be the final result, but it is disheartening none the less. So, instead of just releasing a worthwhile 115 minute R-rated movie, they chop the film up to 92 minutes, steal that PG-13 and hope for the best.

Maybe the 92 minute cut is very good. Poland and I have been in relative agreement for most of the summer (loved Speed Racer, liked Indy 4, disliked Iron Man, hated Incredible Hulk), and the promise of worthwhile plot twists that can't be revealed has peaked my interest.

But, just like The Incredible Hulk, we're asked to fork over a ticket price for a movie where it's all but advertised that we're getting an appetizer for the super-duper uncut, unrated, director's cut in November on DVD or BluRay.

This is different from a comedy that slaps a few minutes back into the DVD release and calls it' unrated'. That's cheap, but it's fair. It's still the same movie. But this, where it's obvious that the film we're seeing is not the film as it was intended, well that's the kind of thing that makes me pay $6 on a Friday morning before work instead of an evening ticket price. Basically, we're paying for Hancock: The Compromise Cut.

PS - Final weekend numbers - not much to comment on here.

The list...

The only real news is that Incredible Hulk kept its drop to a 'mere' 61% and that The Happening kept its almost record-breaking plunge to a 'mere' 65%. Everything else was whatever I said on Friday, times three.

Monday, June 23, 2008

Review: Wanted (2008)

Wanted
2008
110 minutes
Rated R for strong bloody violence throughout, pervasive language and some sexuality.

by Scott Mendelson

During Tim Burton’s biopic, Ed Wood, Johnny Depp places a phone call to a financier who has just screened Wood’s first major motion picture. “Really,” Wood inquires, “worst movie you’ve ever seen? Oh… well, the next one will be better!” Timur Bekmambetov previously directed Nightwatch, which is one of the worst films of the last five years. Intended as a Russian version of the sci-fi punk genre popularized in The Matrix, Blade, or The Terminator, it was an incomprehensible mess of ‘cool’ that I called “the worst thing to happen to Russia since the North Ossetia school massacre of September 2004.” Having missed the sequel, Day Watch, I was morbidly curious about what this visual dry-heave and narrative wet-fart would do with a major American action picture. Well, at least this film was comprehensible. So that’s progress. I guess.

Paraphrasing a friend of mine as we exited the theater, Wanted is a movie so shamelessly derivative of so many other movies that it ought to have a work-cited page at the start of the closing credits. It steals and copies and dumbs down countless action classics of the last twenty-five years. It swipes from, among many others, The Matrix, Fight Club, The Terminator, and Ronin, libeling each and every one of them by their inclusion. It has the sensibility of an over stimulated eight-year old boy who still fears the unexplained phenomenon known as girls. Wanted is the most willfully stupid and condescending action films in years.

The ‘plot’: Take The Matrix. Substitute James McAvoy, Angelina Jolie, and Morgan Freeman for Keanu Reeves, Carrie-Anne Moss, and Laurence Fishburne. Ok, now substitute ‘Wesley, Fox, and Sloane’ for Neo, Trinity, and Morpheus. Now switch out ‘Fraternity’ for ‘rebellion’ and switch out ‘war against the machines’ and ‘great hope’ and toss in ‘master assassin’ and ‘quest to kill various targets that allegedly threaten society’. That was easy. While The Matrix and Fight Club was occasionally subtle and always smart in dealing with the generational angst of males growing up without any real manly purpose in a slightly more feminized world (gross simplification, my apologies), Wanted is literally filled end-to-end with over-the-top and on-the-nose voiceover from McAvoy in which every plot point is explained, every emotional beat is repeated thrice, and every character choice is explained and diagrammed for audience consumption. Seriously, this narration is worse than Blade Runner and worse than Sin City. This is literally the worst voice over I have ever heard in any movie… ever.

McAvoy is hilariously miscast as Wesley Gibson. While is adequate as the put-upon loser in the opening acts (even there, he talks and whines constantly during the action scenes), he is ridiculously unconvincing once he allegedly becomes the master assassin who will prove the savior of ‘The Fraternity’. For most of the picture, Wesley Gibson inexplicably is obsessed with avenging the murder of his father, despite the fact that daddy abandoned him when he was seven-days old. At all times, McAvoy resembles your whiny little brother and really, who wants to see their whiny little brother become an expert killer in a super-secret society? Much of the movie’s advertising campaign has focused on the appeal of Angelina Jolie playing a vixin-ish assassin who engages in various forms of action set-pieces. But don’t be fooled. Jolie’s Fox gets one major action scene at the beginning of the film, but, quickly becomes eye-candy background scenery. The rest of the action either doesn’t involve Fox or has her passively observing the manly work of killing.

For Timur Bekmambetov, women are scary devious creatures who should not be trusted. Wesley’s current girlfriend is an abusive, trashy slut who sleeps around with his best friend. Wesley’s boss is a boorish and vile woman, both because she is in a position of power and because she is grossly overweight. Even the seemingly super-woman Fox eventually finds herself regulated to being the token female. The much-buzzed about action has no sense of physics or suspense. Morgan Freeman has but a few lines of notable dialogue and not a single action scene. The film is quite bloody and violent, but there is no weight or consequence to the violence. There is literally a scene where Wesley’s reckless and vengeful actions single-handedly cause the deaths of hundreds of innocent bystanders (this carnage caused by an allegedly covert and top-secret society goes unmentioned and unnoticed).

We have horribly stupid writing, astonishingly insulting expositional voice over, mediocre acting, wasted talent, head-slappingly stupid action, and a sensibility that caters to pre-adolescent boys who still fear cooties. Yep, Wanted is the best film that Timur Bekmambetov has yet made. Good for him. Really.

Grade: D

George Carlin - 1937-2008

“Scratch any cynic, and you’ll find a disappointed idealist.”

The New York Times obituary does a far better job of summing up his life and groundbreaking work than I ever could. If Lenny Bruce was the Jesus of comedy (martyred for exposing our societal sins using stand-up comedy, dying so that others could follow in his footsteps without fear), then George Carlin was surely one of his lead apostles. Carlin was the last of the holy trinity of stand-up comedy (Bruce, Carlin, and Richard Pryor). He will be missed. He was 71.

Saturday, June 21, 2008

Review: Mamma Mia! (2008)

Mamma Mia!
2008
105 minutes
rated PG-13 (for some sex-related comments)

by Scott Mendelson

Mamma Mia! is an unapologetically goofy musical, wearing its over-the-top absurdity as a badge of honor. Its plot is paper-thin and only a few characters have any real depth, but it is a great performance piece. It is also refreshing in that it is the rare screen musical, like Sweeney Todd, whose original stage source material isn’t specifically about performing. There are no shows to put on, no sock-hop TV shows to try out for, no Motown groups to reunite, and no great songs to write before death. And, like Hairspray and Sweeney Todd, there are no gimmicks to disguise its musical numbers. There are no ‘oh, they’re really all on stage right now’ or ‘oh, it’s all just in Roxie’s imagination’. This is a pleasantly simple domestic comedy where the characters occasionally burst out into song. And, since the story takes place on a small Greek island, they are often accompanied by a literal Greek chorus. And, when everyone is singing and everyone is dancing, Mamma Mia! literally rocks, and rocks hard.

The plot: Sophie is getting married tomorrow. Sophie desperately wants to be walked down the aisle by her real father. After reading her mother’s diary, she’s narrowed it down to three men who romanced Donna right around the time she was conceived. And since she isn’t sure which of the three it is, she’s decided to invite all three. Hilarity, drama, and outlandish musical melodrama inevitably ensues.
As the fans of this long-running and beloved stage show already know, all of the songs performed are actually existing pop-hits from the 1970s Swedish group, ABBA. Amazingly, these disparate songs (‘Dancing Queen’, ‘Take A Chance On Me’, ‘SOS’, etc) come together to form a coherent and somewhat logical narrative, although the dialogue scenes do most of the heavy-lifting in the plot area.

Not everything works flawlessly, though. Some of the songs just don’t zing (‘Money Money Money’ is a song I just don’t like, be it here or on a ABBA greatest hits CD). Furthermore, the somewhat madcap behavior that likely feels more natural on stage comes off as stagey onscreen (this is most evident in Meryl Streep’s pratfall-ish dancing for the title track). But, for the most part, the film succeeds when and where it needs to and truly finds its emotional footing by the first third. Yes, a few songs are cut from the original show, and several are shortened, but it’s a surprisingly faithful adaptation (it doesn’t gut the entire second act for expediency, like Rent).

The acting is splendid across the board, as expected. Meryl Streep has a blast as Donna, and it’s such a winning, joyful performance that she may end up with an Oscar nod purely by force of habit. All three alleged fathers (Pierce Brosnan, Stellan Skarsgard, and Colin Firth) have great fun with the madcap plot and the opportunity to belt a few bars here and there. Brosnan’s singing is a bit shocking in its vocal quality and its sheer go-for-it gusto. It’s not bad (he’s no Gerald Butler) but it takes some getting used to and it may prove to be divisive (I liked it, my wife did not). It doesn’t help that much of his onscreen crooning is filmed in close-up, so his exaggerated mouth movements are all the more apparent. Everyone else (Julie Walters, Christine Baranski, Dominic Sky, etc.) is splendidly game.

Special note must be made of the young lady who would be Sophie. After four years of slowly moving up the ranks, with notable supporting work in Mean Girls, Veronica Mars, and Big Love (and TV guest-spots galore), Amanda Seyfried finally graduates to leading-lady status as the bride-to-be. And she’s never been better (or looked lovelier). She is a terrific singer, she gives a completely engaging dramatic performance, and she has real chemistry with her mother, her fiancee, and all three of her would-be fathers. This is a truly star-making performance.
Mamma Mia! just plain works. It’s fun, it’s engaging, it’s family friendly (the PG-13 rating is a joke), and it’ll send you out of the theater tapping your toes and humming your new favorite ABBA song. If you liked the show, or if you like musicals in general, this one will more than fit the bill. It’s not the near masterpiece that Hairspray was, but it’s a smaller, more intimate story that operates on a different emotional level. It’s a more faithful adaptation than Rent, and it’s a plain better movie than Phantom of The Opera, or… shudder, The Producers. In fact, minor quibbles aside, it’s one of the most enjoyable movies of the summer.

grade: B

Friday Numbers - blood flows at the US box office

The List

First off, Get Smart pulls in $13.5 million, setting it up to make about $39 million, which is where everyone more or less pegged it. This is a fine opening for a very-well marketed movie. The cast was filled with demographically targeted actors and every one of them earned their keep. This one should play at moderately healthy levels for the next few weeks. It IS quasi-assembly-line film making, but it's occasionally charming and harmless. I laughed about six times, which is about five more than I expected to.

Kung Fu Panda dropped another 40% with $6.4 million, again seemingly running neck and neck with Cars. Yay for quality cartoons! I shant expect another weekend drop this low next weekend.

Indiana Jones 4 has now surpassed Pirates Of The Caribbean 3 in the day-to-day numbers. Pirates 3 ended up with $309 million, so expect Indy 4 to close out with $315 million.

And that's pretty much all of the good news...

So, Marvel's brilliant strategy to reboot the Hulk franchise continues with expected results. Hulk's second Friday dropped a mammoth 76% five-years ago, ending up with $18 million for a 71% drop for the weekend (the biggest % drop ever for a movie opening above $23 million). So, now with an extra $30 million spent on the new film, and allegedly more positive word of mouth, the second Friday for The Incredible Hulk is... $6.5 million... a drop of 70%. Nice work, morons. Can't imagine why you went bankrupt twelve years ago. Anyway, expect the drop to level off a little and end up with a still disastrous 65% drop. At this rate, the new Hulk will actually be lucky to equal the old Hulk's $132 million. It's called frontloading, and it's changed quite a bit since 2003, people. So, for those who bought Marvel in stock, in late April, I'd say yesterday would have been the day to sell.

Speaking of Hulk's 76% drop being a record for a second weekend for a boffo opener... that record may just fall this weekend. Despite all the attacks in the press over M. Night Shyamalan's alleged ego and what-not, audiences still liked the guy enough to show up in solid numbers ($30 million) for The Happening's opening weekend. I wish I could comment on the film's quality, but I haven't had a chance to see it (my wife wants to see it, so it's harder to schedule around the ten-month old). Although judging by this weekend's numbers, we could probably take Allison and not piss off too many people.

Yes, The Happening's second Friday is... $3.3 million... a drop of... 75%. Holy crap... which is the opinion that almost everyone I've talked to has stated in regards to the film. Anyway, Friday was a bit front loaded, so the weekend should theoretically level off to a slightly less pathetic 70%. On the plus side (grasping at straws, I know), The Happening will end with weekend with $50 million, so it'll easily make back its $60 million budget and is on track to do at least another $60 million overseas. This one will make money, but the damage to Shyamalan's reputation with regular moviegoers (the ones who didn't bother to see Lady In The Water) may require some serious intervention. Even if Avatar: The Last Air-Bender fits the bill, I'm thinking a musical comedy here. Might I suggest that M. Night do the least M. Nighty thing possible and direct the eventual adaptation of Wicked?

But wait, there's more terrible news (or great news, if you believe in justice). The new Darkseid of comedy, Mike Myers, watched his allegedly putrid Love Guru get stomped, starting out with a mere $5.5 million. If this film is in any way front loaded, expect a three-day under $15 million. If this is actually playing like a childrens' film, then it might just make it to $18 million. Might I suggest that Mike Myers consider a co-starring role in M. Night Shyamalan's Wicked?

But wait... there's more!! Adam Sandler fans continue to flee from the overpowering stench of effort and would-be quality. Yes, Don't Mess With The Zohan dropped another 60% from last Friday. That'll teach Sandler to... try!

Yeah, it's nasty out there this weekend. But don't fret moviegoers, because it's all heavy hitters from here on in. For the next month, we have Wall-E, Wanted, Hancock, Hellboy II, The Dark Knight (better not stink), Mama Mia (doesn't stink), and X-Files 2. I'll update with the final numbers on Monday night.

Scott Mendelson

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